| Trying to bring it back. |
[Mar. 18th, 2009|08:54 pm] |
Dear LJ,
I feel embarrassed looking through you. The amount of drama I have created is too much to bare.
Oh well! The bitch is back!
How is everyone? Are you still out there? |
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| New Order. |
[Mar. 21st, 2008|02:08 am] |
I always wonder if it's love.
I am working thorugh so many things lately.
Is it worth it?
Is it for someone that will do the same for me?
I am doing my best; is the other party?
I don't want to sleep alone tonight...
I really don't want to.
I'm tired of feeling like this. |
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| This is an old post I found... |
[Mar. 21st, 2008|02:07 am] |
I feel like I have given up on a lot of things in my life this year.
Ugh. I can't be vague here; my heart is oozing blood.
(Let me start over)
I feel I have given up on a lot of people in my life this year.
It feels a bit more like a sacrifice.
But why do I feel this way?
What did I sacrifice?
Why did I sacrifice it?
I sacrificed important friendships, and for what reason?
I'm only 24 and don't know everything.
All I think I know is this...
In every and any friendship/relationship it takes the patience and strength of both parties to maintain a balance...maybe even a mutual dependence...a togetherness.
If I hurt anyone in the process I know I have always owned up to it and apologized, but I feel I didn't get that in return. Was I wrong?
I got into a lot of fights this year. I got into a lot of fights last year too It continued into last week. I am living in confusion about many things. I don't want to depend on anyone sometimes. Is this an issue.
Mybe the people I've given up on really just gave up on me.
Who knows? |
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| A letter. |
[Aug. 5th, 2007|09:49 pm] |
Dear Jesus,
Please remind me to not jump the gun on this one.
Trying to be patient and not freak,
Jaime J. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 2nd, 2007|09:15 pm] |
Dear No Doubt,
I love you. It is the 7th year anniversary of the first time we saw each other. I miss you.
Waiting in line to buy time,
Jaime J.
Image from beacon-street.net |
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| ND. |
[Aug. 2nd, 2007|09:06 pm] |
Dear No Doubt,
I love you. It is the 7th year anniversary of the first time we saw each other. I miss you.
Waiting in line to buy time,
Jaime J.
Image from beacon-street.net |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 30th, 2007|09:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Windmill Inn | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | Fine. | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | "Waiting Room" ND | ] |
All I can think about is song writing.
Song writing song writing song writing song writing.
I have all these ideas coming to me at all times of the day.
Also, I can't stop thinking about Bank of America.
That's right!
B of A!
I didn't stutter.
Haha.
You wish you knew.
Call me and I'll tell you 'bout it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 30th, 2007|02:05 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Folk's | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  creative | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | "Early Winter" GS | ] |
Dear LJ,
I'm sorry that I have neglected you. The pull of myspace was too great.
Since December I:
worked two jobs, repaired my car three times, started up a new relationship, went to Hawaii again, Turned 24, was only a few feet from Gwen, got dumped, started working with Woodspine/Dark Hall (I love you soo much), and started writing for a local Hip-Hop/R&B label.
It seems like there has been so much more than this.
I'm single and it's confusing. Relationships are a mess sometimes, but I am truly glad that I had the chance to experience a somewhat pleasant one. A question lingers in my mind though. As humans, why do we say we one second say love each other and then make hurtful comments we don't get what we want?
I think I've been on both sides here.
I'm still angry as hell about it all, but I will not dwell upon it anymore.
We can't be what we want each other to be, and that is ok.
I hate sleeping alone.
One night you're lying in bed with someone feeling so hopeful and content. Another night, you are just strangers to each other in a public setting.
Go figure. |
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| ? |
[Apr. 1st, 2007|11:20 pm] |
Where have I been?
Call me and find out.
So much has changed since December.
You will never believe it! |
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| The Sweet Escape. |
[Dec. 5th, 2006|01:33 pm] |
I feel like I have lost complete grips with human decency.
I want to start over.
The length of time necessary to heal and repair is beyond me.
I used to always say, "If worse comes to worse you can always fake your own death."
Sounds nice.
Oh impulsive Gwen Stefani shopping!
Your aide is appreciated.
I'm regretful.
It's equal.
I'm one for being too dramatic.
Pardon me. |
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| I'm the kinda guy that calls the next day. |
[Oct. 6th, 2006|08:40 pm] |
I feel incomplete.
Maybe I just haven't slept.
Ugh.
I'm glad that I do have the courage to take charge when I need to.
I'm independent.
It feels great.
Someone asked me if my music was good.
After a brief moment of hesitation, I said yes.
I'm glad I said yes.
So glad.
Still, I got a long way to go.
Haha. Cheesy. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 28th, 2006|12:27 pm] |
Stumbling through the motions of skills I have mastered over these last few years.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are.
Be what you are. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 22nd, 2006|03:21 pm] |
Life is ever changing.
Lonely today but I managed.
I stopped by the cemetery to find the ground my grandmother's bones rest in.
The visit was much needed; I regret being a stranger to her in my childhood.
It's amazing to think that her existence gave breathe to mine.
I am lucky.
"Death is for the living," never felt more true.
I saw a little abuelito in the distance.
He sat on his lawn chair in the shade.
He cried.
I saw so many headstones with the last name SOTO carved in.
There's an entire branch of mi familia that I have never even met.
I wonder constantly.
I wonder.
Peach Iced Tea at Itl was nice today too.
John Rechy was fucking fantastic. |
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| Good and Bad. |
[Sep. 6th, 2006|10:57 pm] |
I don't live with the folks.
My music and voice are getting stronger.
I am having fun in life.
Discomfort.
I hate my head. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 24th, 2006|09:16 pm] |
I'm so sad.
so so sad. |
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| Friends. |
[Aug. 20th, 2006|02:18 pm] |
Ryan Avery, I love you.
I'll never forget that huge mohawk (you had it when we first met).
Peace. Love. Luck.
I hate saying goodbye to friends.
Kristin Evans?!
Ugh.
This is too much.
"You're really lovely underneath it all." |
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| Six years. |
[Aug. 2nd, 2006|10:56 pm] |
It's my sixth year anniversary.
ND and me.
Mesa Amphitheater.
Return of Saturn the album.
I'll never forget it.
EVER.
"Get your hands up in the air!!!!"
"Can you tell I'm faking it? but I want to be myself"
"You guys voted to hear this song...(singing)I'm hanging out with me..."
"Fuck you Mr!"
I was 17.
Sophia was there. |
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| Farewell Sexy July. |
[Jul. 31st, 2006|11:28 pm] |
I just realized that I truly did have myself a SEXY JULY!
In other news, I hate feeling like I'll never be accepted.
In more news, I hate feeling sorry for myself.
In honest news, I love feeling sorry for myself.
I loved all the dramatics that lit Craig's 21st on fire.
I still love my friendships.
I still love myself.
Fuck hatred.
"Flames to dust, lovers to friends
why do all good things come to an end?"
I am sooooooooooooooo glad Adam came to Craig's party.
His presence taught me a lot. |
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